also read-BUILD IT UP

the initial words of wisdom, many give to someone,who might have been the victim of a real bad misfortune, and where that person had lost what he had.People often advice " try and forget the past" and they justify this by saying "remembering it,would only take you backwards" and invariably, i was no different and my misfortune{which had come about in the form of a accident}.So, have been at the receiving end of it,ever since

although i agree with the fact, that there is no point what so ever talking or thinking about what has happened,but remembering the past has helped me more than,what i would have gained, forgetting,and being a person who did what he thought was right,and seldom did things,what others, told him to.This aspect of my nature helped me,do what i thought....and not go in with,others thoughts.

As i disagreed to this then,and even now,infact i would say "remembering the past, could be put to anyone's advantage,if only it is channeled in the right way" aggression can be a great asset and i would like to suggest it, to anyone who is at the receiving end,of the so called 'bad fate', in their personal life,building aggression, and then channeling it,in the right way,is all what is required

this was a lesson, that life had incorporated within me.And all that was required was,to have a very level headed approach, to the situation Personally for me, the reasons for this aggression were numerous.because the past was filled with activities,that missing them was just too natural

As it was sure,a thing to be missed,when you were an overactive person,and one who would be,up to something or the other http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-5h3vf_UQs,and the past was,quite enough to keep me haunting everyday,after my accident..

the thing, that came naturally,was to be building up,this aggression,when for the first time i knew,what being alone and a pushover felt like..when every time i was ignored,when for months at a stretch i would be, all alone,i just had my family to even speak to,and then i knew for certain,that i had lost something ..

Got a real bad slap,when one of the neurologist's, here in one of the leading hospital's,recommended that,it was better for me to go and stay at one of the handicap school's,where they taught people,how to live with their disability,.i felt really bad as that would have meant,that i will accept ,that i will remain a handicap forever and it was really not all that easy to even imagine.Can anyone? who had seen what a normal life was,and.it felt demeaning, all the more for me, as a person,who had this tough picture about himself

The aggression got a boost when my girl friend,who had given some, beautiful dreams and hopes,just ditched me,And as a consequence,was in ruins for a long time.Well "ruins" is an understatement.

It was,just an irony,that the very tough life after my accident was doing less to hurt, than what some of the people,had made me..

but after every setbacks & the ill treatments,.i always kept telling myself,in fact to this very day,i see myself,telling this, that one day i will comeback and comeback strong and things be different,but all this aggression just needed to be vented out and i was desperate to regain what i had lost,and everything added up and the answer to all my queries was,to be fit again.As i had many things to be proved wrong,including the fact that i was not gonna remain a handicap,forever

but there were many obstacles,in my quest for being fit.The first being, i couldn't even stand,i remember the first time i tried to do a single push up,which earlier i could do 50, with ease,i realized i could not push my left side of the body, and there was an unbearable pain in my wrist as they were affected in the accident

but the aggression never let me quit,just because it pained or i couldn't do it.And i figured,the remedy of not being able to stand and do exercises, was to do them, kneeling .i decided to give it sometime and just hoped that things will fall in place,with time.Well 3 years have passed since then,i still cant stand but things way better,now

but aggression gave the will to persevere and help me,be on course and i believe,am no more the same pushover,like before &.i see a major shift in people's attitude and it is a good feeling to be getting back the dignity,from just being a pushover

but for all this, if i had to thank just one thing,it would have to be,the aggression and in a way grateful to all those people in having brought about this,although unknowingly and unwillingly

so i reckon,
      remembering  the past,
                 not a bad thing ,afterall..
                                if that could be,channeled in the right way...:)
                                                       
                               

also read - LAUGH IT OUT

Many dont see laughter, as important and wont even consider to acknowledge by laughing ,if they had seen or heard anything funny and will try and suppress this urge,as much as, they could.May be they feel it would look too silly or childish enough,if others may see them laugh ,but there are others who dont leave any opportunity to laugh about at the slightest glimpse of one

A closer introspection of where i belonged? revealed  a little different answer to that question,as i sure laughed a lot, but there was more to that,it was about not wanting to buckle down and proving to myself that i was not bogged down by the tough circumstances, that i will change myself from that of before, that freak accident.. and was also not willing,to let anything affect that fun aspect of my nature.

the past sure has not been an ideally a good one,that i would have wanted to remember,.but the future seemed, full of opportunities,the present certainly was not a joy ride but that didn't mean that i be unhappy and  worried, and take out the fun quotient, out of my life...afterall laughter sure adds LIFE to your years

laughing it out or trying to find reasons to laugh about,sure has helped, keep my cool..because when i try to look back, into the not too distant past,as to what all i have been through, these years,i credit my sanity to the fact that i always tried to laugh & also have tried  to find reasons to laugh about,even if its nothing too significant

its not as if i could laugh, because i have no worries,like the reason many at times, give.But laughing it out, is not entirely dependent on the situation,that one is dealt with...a major part of that is about ,character..because its never easy to have, even a smile when you are in pain,but if you can,that shows how much tough you are..its doesn't mean,if you get worried ,so you don't qualify to be tough .Worrying comes natural,even to the toughest, but the ability to snap out of that worried state,could be the deciding factor

on a personal level a decent chunk of my sanity has also to be credited to the fact that whenever i could,i would devote my time watching television shows or movies which were humorous in nature,that really got my mind out of the hard realities of my personal life.

the thing i deeply miss though,is the fact that, i can't quickly form a humorous statement out of the flaws in the statements the other person made in a conversation,which had been my habit,since long.but as an aftermath of this accident, my speech has been affected,and when i try to do the same thing again now, people dont get the joke as my voice clarity is deeply affected and then i would have to explain the joke,to them and nothing kills the humor in a joke,more than you requiring to explain it.but even after knowing this fact,can't seem to stop myself.People look good, when they smile,and i guess its worth the effort,in trying to make them..:)

There is also this fact of LIFE,that i have realized,more-so now,and it being..the probability of people missing and remembering someone who was very serious in nature, drastically reduces, than a person who is full of life and who likes to spread joy, laughter and happiness,if anytime they are not in the picture for a while or forever.So there is a reason more, for all those people,who hold back laughter,to let it free and its not soo difficult,as some might perceive...it to be

so, RELAX ...& laugh it out....
             the time at "present" in your life,is only a sure reality so,
                                              make it a real present for you..and SPREAD JOY