also read-BUILD IT UP

the initial words of wisdom, many give to someone,who might have been the victim of a real bad misfortune, and where that person had lost what he had.People often advice " try and forget the past" and they justify this by saying "remembering it,would only take you backwards" and invariably, i was no different and my misfortune{which had come about in the form of a accident}.So, have been at the receiving end of it,ever since

although i agree with the fact, that there is no point what so ever talking or thinking about what has happened,but remembering the past has helped me more than,what i would have gained, forgetting,and being a person who did what he thought was right,and seldom did things,what others, told him to.This aspect of my nature helped me,do what i thought....and not go in with,others thoughts.

As i disagreed to this then,and even now,infact i would say "remembering the past, could be put to anyone's advantage,if only it is channeled in the right way" aggression can be a great asset and i would like to suggest it, to anyone who is at the receiving end,of the so called 'bad fate', in their personal life,building aggression, and then channeling it,in the right way,is all what is required

this was a lesson, that life had incorporated within me.And all that was required was,to have a very level headed approach, to the situation Personally for me, the reasons for this aggression were numerous.because the past was filled with activities,that missing them was just too natural

As it was sure,a thing to be missed,when you were an overactive person,and one who would be,up to something or the other http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-5h3vf_UQs,and the past was,quite enough to keep me haunting everyday,after my accident..

the thing, that came naturally,was to be building up,this aggression,when for the first time i knew,what being alone and a pushover felt like..when every time i was ignored,when for months at a stretch i would be, all alone,i just had my family to even speak to,and then i knew for certain,that i had lost something ..

Got a real bad slap,when one of the neurologist's, here in one of the leading hospital's,recommended that,it was better for me to go and stay at one of the handicap school's,where they taught people,how to live with their disability,.i felt really bad as that would have meant,that i will accept ,that i will remain a handicap forever and it was really not all that easy to even imagine.Can anyone? who had seen what a normal life was,and.it felt demeaning, all the more for me, as a person,who had this tough picture about himself

The aggression got a boost when my girl friend,who had given some, beautiful dreams and hopes,just ditched me,And as a consequence,was in ruins for a long time.Well "ruins" is an understatement.

It was,just an irony,that the very tough life after my accident was doing less to hurt, than what some of the people,had made me..

but after every setbacks & the ill treatments,.i always kept telling myself,in fact to this very day,i see myself,telling this, that one day i will comeback and comeback strong and things be different,but all this aggression just needed to be vented out and i was desperate to regain what i had lost,and everything added up and the answer to all my queries was,to be fit again.As i had many things to be proved wrong,including the fact that i was not gonna remain a handicap,forever

but there were many obstacles,in my quest for being fit.The first being, i couldn't even stand,i remember the first time i tried to do a single push up,which earlier i could do 50, with ease,i realized i could not push my left side of the body, and there was an unbearable pain in my wrist as they were affected in the accident

but the aggression never let me quit,just because it pained or i couldn't do it.And i figured,the remedy of not being able to stand and do exercises, was to do them, kneeling .i decided to give it sometime and just hoped that things will fall in place,with time.Well 3 years have passed since then,i still cant stand but things way better,now

but aggression gave the will to persevere and help me,be on course and i believe,am no more the same pushover,like before &.i see a major shift in people's attitude and it is a good feeling to be getting back the dignity,from just being a pushover

but for all this, if i had to thank just one thing,it would have to be,the aggression and in a way grateful to all those people in having brought about this,although unknowingly and unwillingly

so i reckon,
      remembering  the past,
                 not a bad thing ,afterall..
                                if that could be,channeled in the right way...:)